Women in Leadership Today

Choosing the Medium

Have you ever decided to bring your Blackberry on a family vacation or personal outing feeling the need to provide others you work with access to you during these times only to experience a backlash when the quick blunt email or text message reply you send to be quick is mis understood harming an important relationship? “Blending” is a popular behavior among professionals who want to have it all, great career, family or personal life, community involvement and personal time. Blending is when the person tries to be with their children while working, or working while working out at the gym, or traveling on vacation. The downside to “Blending” work and personal pursuits is that you are not really present with either one. Errors can occur because your attention is divided, and often between something that should be handled in a pragmatic way, vs a sensitive or loving way.

Knowing when to use voicemail, email or telephone, when to arrive in person, or when to just say “no” to being available is vital to conveying the right importance and tone for any message. Balancing the mode of communication based on your self-knowledge (am I too direct, indirect, unexpressive, et al ) is also important.

For example, if you know you are efficient in your work and reply quickly to all of your voicemails, you may, in your haste, respond to a disgruntled peer over voicemail instead of a more appropriate medium like the telephone, or in person over coffee before sales calls. A hasty, efficient reply may escalate an already sensitive situation if your tone (without your body language, expression, etc) is misunderstood.

Keep in mind that thinking through whom you are and what your best medium is for communicating a variety of feelings, is key to providing a congruent style of communication to support your professional relationships. Women in Leadership TODAY, how do you keep your work and professional life from bleeding over to the other? How do you decide when to use synchronous vs asynchronous communication? I look forward to hearing from you.

Removing Interference

There is an old saying that goes: “Your actions are speaking so loudly I can’t hear a word you are saying!”

Interference is sometimes cited by women and men who are distracted by the clothing, hair or jewelry worn by a woman communicating on a specific topic. For example, one woman commented that every time the new sales representative in her district spoke, she flung her hair back, creating a distraction that took people’s minds off of what she said and onto what her hair was doing. She also wore crop tops that revealed her stomach beneath her suit jacket; although popular among the 20-something crowd in the city, they were inappropriate business attire for a conservative company. During breaks, people commented about her choice of dress, not her ideas about how to grow sales in the territory she was managing.

Often dress, timing and style can interfere with a message, preventing if from being fully accepted and received by others. Be sure to notice how your nonverbal communication is affecting the way you are communicating to others. For example, are you dressed for the occasion and company? If you are attending a company picnic are you in your old and tattered jeans with holes because they are comfortable? Or are you in jeans and a more tailored casual shirt and denim jacket because though casual it adds polish and presence? How about at the Gala for the charity that your boss is supporting? Are you in the low cut dress that reveals too much? Or are you in something modest that communicates your elegance and sophistication vs. the fact this is a nice evening to dress appealingly for your significant other? One good rule of thumb is if you hesitate about what you want to wear and are requesting from others in your home approval of the appropriateness of your attire, then that should be a cue the outfit is not the right one. Confidence at events like these can do great things for your image and career. Dress with confidence and show everyone you know how to handle your self with class in every setting!

Have you ever made a dress faux pas at work or a work event? What happened/ How did you handle it? Have you seen others make critical mistakes? How about great examples of impactful dress that added to the presence of the female leader? Women in Leadership TODAY, I look forward to dialoging with you on this topic!

Putting Training and Development on the Executive Agenda

Are you getting the training you need to advance in your career? Relative training in your respective field is key to your future success.

Your learning process is continuous throughout your entire career. When executive development programs are identified, their content development stage sometimes goes unexamined by senior management resulting in the final session content deviating from any real tie in to corporate goals for the year. This absence of alignment of training to corporate goals keeps the real value of training from supporting corporate performance, and thus ultimately, shareholder value.

What is sometimes missing in the national roll out of leadership training initiatives is: · long term development plans for women and minorities, measurements of success that tie into executive compensation, · continuity across regionally implemented programs on the core competencies taught during the programs for developing women and minorities, · plans for future integration into the initial training curriculum moving forward for talent with high potential, and · a temporary but not sustained executive commitment to following the progress of women and minorities.

Developing a core roll out with mixed training mediums, and then allowing regional business centers to vary their approach on how to deliver the training to their local teams, while still maintaining a consistency of core competence development, is key to realizing a short and long term training investment. As you prepare to attend your next leadership development experience, ask yourself how it will help you meet the goals and objectives for your performance, that of your department, and how it ties to the corporate initiatives for developing women leaders. Next, inititiate a dialog with your direct supervisor to discuss your thoughts and request their input on the alignment of your training time and budget with the division and company goals. Your inititive in having this important dialog with your boss will help you be seen as a leader that ties development to business objectives and gets training on the executive agenda.

Find Your Voice

Gender studies conducted during the last ten years consistently show that men speak far more than women, while women do more listening. Women who care to be heard need to find their own voice, and leverage their intellectual capital and experience to influence leadership or change the cultural rules of the environment in which they work. No voice, no impact.

With one top executive woman I coach, she found herself struggling to get her point heard in meetings. She found the assertiveness of the men she often interfaced with was difficult to overcome in order to articulate her thoughts while in a large group. Some tips for women who struggle to enter into a board room or meeting room conversations should try the following: Be prepared to insert your presence with your voice at the first break from someone’s input. Lean forward while sitting up tall and use a strong yet slow paced voice to share your point. Transitions statements like: “To add to Larry’s point…” or “ Last meeting I had shared the sales data from the first half of the year, as you recall…” or, “I have three additional points we should consider, they include…” Once you are in, break eye contact with the person who last shared their opinion and focus on other people in the room. Truncate your message. When done, listen to the responses from others. Part of finding your voice, is truly hearing what was said before and after you spoke.

Do you use your voice to the benefit of the group? Does your voice add or detract from what you are saying? Tone, volume, pace and quality of content all weigh in on the impact you have when speaking out as a leader. Women in Leadership TODAY---does your message get communicated well to others? If yes, what works for you? If no, what challenges do you face in having your opinions heard? I would like to hear from you!

Becoming… Jane Austen?

Last night my family and I saw the movie, “Becoming Jane… (Austen)” Today her novel, a third edition copy of Pride and Prejudice (first published in 1813), sits in front of the computer where I am inspired to write to each of you. The movie is about Jane’s life, the very inspiration for the six classic novels she ultimately completes for classic literature. My favorite Austen work was Pride and Prejudice written by Jane at the tender age of 19.

In the movie, Jane was asked for her hand in marriage by a man she did not love, but who was wealthy. Her mother was aghast that her daughter, a beautiful young girl with no dowry would turn him down—“You know, Jane, it may be the best offer you ever get…” her mother warned. Jane, flippant and confident announced in a day where women were not allowed to own property in their own name or work outside the home for wages without becoming a social outcast— “I will make my own living mother, by my pen.” Her mother laughed hysterically and gave a warning lecture about the dubious fate that might befall her daughter. Jane had three total proposals of marriage in her lifetime. Jane ultimately, chose (although she came close once to eloping) to never marry. From a young age, Jane had a passion for penning (as they called it then) a story. A story she would write and read aloud to her family and visitors. Jane and her sister never married, but Jane went on to be one of the great literary giants of all time.

I know as a young girl announcing at the tender age of 13 I would by the time I graduated High School have a full athletic scholarship in basketball, I too sounded like my dreams were out of place. It was only one year after Title IX had been passed and I had never played organized basketball. I was standing a lanky six feet one inch. Playing basketball as a girl at that time was not a social norm and clearly going to college on an athletic scholarship had at that time just happened once. One woman that year, one scholarship. Parents were still telling my girlfriends it was unfeminine to play basketball and they could damage themselves and their menstruation (and therefore future fertility) if they did play such a “masculine” sport. So, they did not join me. Fortunately, I had parents who believed as I did, that any dream was possible, and a sister beyond her time who educated me on the scholarship process, and a coach who wanted me to succeed as much as I did. This combination made my dream happen.

How much adversity can you face in pursuit of your dreams? How often have you had to go against social norms to be who you truly are both heart and soul? What social norms get in the way of your life today? Women in Leadership TODAY, let’s talk!

The Value of Mentoring

As I mentioned in my last posting, defining who you are at work beyond any stereotypes that may follow you is key to maintaining your sense of self both at home and at work. Often, we all come across situations that challenge us. We may be unsure how to approach a certain situation, how to interface with a difficult co-worker or lead a project or group. Finding mentors at the different development stages of our career is key to our ability to navigate the culture in our company and move toward greater career success. Mentoring is a key theme of success for women who currently hold top executive positions. Over dozen’s of mid to senior level executive women interviewed using the W.IN Leadership® Questionnaire say that mentors have made a tremendous difference in their career success.

I had several mentors early in my career but did not even know it. Often we can be guided, taught, lead or supported by people who think highly of us, recognize our talent and want us to do well. In one situation a National Sales Manager came to a district meeting I was in and heard my interactions with my district and district manager. Later when I returned to the home office for additional training, he always appeared in the back of the room. He joined the group for dinner and always asked me how I was doing and what I wanted to do with my career. Charlie was mentoring me. Charlie then became the Vice President of Trade and Government Relations. Soon, he sponsored me as the first woman in the role of Trade Relations Supervisor. He walked me through the role of the job, where he felt I had the skills and competencies to perform, and where I would need to get more support and guidance to learn the business, the customers and the operational processes needed to manage my job. He was the first of many great mentors who supported me in my career.

Another mentor of mine was a peer. I didn’t realize it until years later, but he did a lot for my career by bringing me along to breakfast and lunches with the National Sales Manager and Director of Marketing. It was my ability to gain access to these influential leaders in the organization that provided me with additional relationships.

Mentors can be extremely valuable; so ask yourself this – who are my mentors?

Customize Your Group

It’s important to join networks, attend seminars and other events. But, what if you want to start your own group?

During a past Women in Leadership seminar I was facilitating, I met a group of women from the West Coast who had initiated a book club to begin networking with one another once a month. The book club originated from a group of women who felt they shared a number of career obstacles that they needed help with. These women were in mid-level management positions and sought out one another to discuss the unique career challenges they all faced. The first session and book opened up discussions on a number of topics the women were facing in their current jobs.

Five years ago, Pat Bleil, vice president and business director for the western business unit of Philadelphia-based Wyeth Pharmaceuticals, originated the Business Book Club for Women concept. Since the networking group formed, the five core members have all been promoted. Three have been promoted twice! Now another group of women at Wyeth in San Francisco have begun a similar networking book club.

The key takeaway here is don’t get discouraged if you haven’t found a networking group that suits your needs….take charge and create your own.

Reach beyond your company

Many women often stay focused on events with other co-workers. It is great to network with people on your team, but look beyond the obvious network and find groups that diversify the pool of professionals you surround yourself with. For example, The Healthcare Businesswomen’s Association (www.HBAnet.org) is a great organization whose primary mission is to advance the careers of women in the healthcare industry. Another great resource is National Association for Female Executives (www.NAFE.com). These organizations, and numerous others, help keep women abreast of the top companies for women and working mothers and are good sources of information to utilize while building a career, reentering the workforce or realigning your career. Remember, reach beyond your company, and out of your comfort zone, to expand your network.

Trading Time for Money

I started my own business in 2001, when my son, Danny, was only 15 months old. In a matter of 3 months time, I finalized my divorce, became a single mother, and resigned a director level position where I made well over six figures. I was convinced after a week, the prior December, while at the Center for Creative Leadership in San Diego, California, that I was trading time for money. I was 40, divorced, and had already had an 18 year run at a successful career but was unhappy in my work. I found myself surrounded by a lot of talent and great people, but uninspired by the corporate politics and a culture that was a poor fit for my outgoing, outspoken and driven personality.

It was time. I needed to find another way to work, another way to make the idea of “Flex-time” real for me so I could work and be proud of the kind of mother I wanted to become. So I quit. For the first time in my life I listened to myself. My family was against me moving away from “security” and moving toward the ambiguity of becoming an entrepreneur. I truly acted on behalf of what was my self evident truth: I consistently did one thing very well in corporate life—I sang off a different song page.

In April 2001, I moved forward to begin my company, Unlimited Performance Training, Inc., with only a business card. Later that month at a conference, I was speaking as a keynote on what makes women successful as leaders. I moderated a panel called “A League of their Own.” Four executive women came to speak on how they drove their careers, what obstacles they had faced, how they overcame those obstacles and how they managed their personal lives. The session was a huge success. At the end of the keynote, a woman named Alma Greer walked up to me and gave me her card. She said, “I love what you do, and how you do it.” I smiled. “I want to work with you. Here is my card; call me.”

There it was. Customer number one. It only took one potential client who believed in me to begin the launch of my company and my new life.

I Captured Your Queen

It has always struck me in the game of chess how getting the Queen increases your odds of winning, but the actual win comes not with just capturing the Queen from your opponents (you can win even if you lose your Queen), but with the final “Check-Mate”. And for those of you who do not play chess… Check-Mate means you win because you have gotten the King cornered, not the Queen. So does that mean in business, as in chess, the only way you lose is when your best man (the King) is cornered and unable to move? Which means in the game of chess, as in the game of business, the real stakes sometimes are won or lost when companies are able to keep women (the Queens) in the ‘game’ for the high stakes advantage. Do you think companies today believe this?

Do corporate board members believe that having more women on the board of directors might equate to an increase in return to shareholders? Catalyst (the research firm for women and minorities) has data to back up this insight. Should Fortune 500 companies today include in their corporate strategy the development of women and their equal representation in succession planning? In the future, is the possibility of greater female representation on boards and in executive positions just a myth, or a strong possibility? What has to change, continue happening or end for this goal to be realized?

The first sentence could also be revised to say something like: I find it interesting (or odd) that in the game of chess getting the queen from your opponent increases your odds of winning, but the actual “win” comes not just with capturing the queen, but with the final “Check-Mate.”